How to Trade Pain for Peace
When I was working as a nurse during the pandemic, many mornings I woke up a with a migraine and a stomach ache. I would worry sometimes how my work as a nurse was putting myself and others at a high risk for COVID-19, but also the myriad of other diseases we like to forget exist in the world. I worried about my and my family’s health, but even more so, I worried about my patients. In those moments, I turned to art and to Christ, who I can always “cast my cares on.” (1 Peter 5:7)
One night I had an incredibly challenging shift. One of my favorite patients began seizing unexpectedly and passed out. I had to call a code. Myself and other nurses helped the docs stabilize her. After a few tests, she seized again and we repeated the process but this time, we sent her to the ICU. I got home exhausted, emotionally and mentally depleted. I tried to process my emotions without much luck. Had I done enough? Would my patient be OK? Then I felt God remind me to look at and then draw this particular drawing by the Renaissance artist Peter Paul Rubens.
As I drew this little sketch pictured, I realized that we each have different images of what Jesus looked like and how we each perceive him. As A.W. Tozer says, “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.” It made me reflect on how we develop images of Christ. Over time, the more we invite Christ into our day, the more we will understand and appreciate the love he has for us. Thinking about His face inspires a deep love in me as I think about the love He has for us. The love he has for each one of us is perfect. His care for each one of us lacks nothing.
To tie up the story about my patient, what finally allowed me to sleep was resting in understanding that his love for my patient was far deeper than mine. His love for me was far deeper than just loving me if I was a “good enough” nurse or not.
When we find ourselves in pain or worry, friends, let’s remember this; let us put our eyes and minds off of our circumstance and instead put them on God. He is our perfection, our protection and the One who turns all things to His good for us. Walk in His love today!
Question: When you think about Christ looking at you with love, how does it make you feel? If this encouraged you in anyway, I’d love to hear about it in the comments.